[показать]Не могли бы вы перевести на английский фразу:
"Чему равна производная от трех икс?"

Знаете ли вы, что... В английском языке выражение «green finger» (зеленый палец) сродни русскому «легкая рука» — так называют человека, которому буквально достаточно воткнуть простую палку в землю, как она тут же оживет и зацветет : )

[показать]A distinguished young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the Priest beside her, 'Father, may I ask a favour?'
'Of course child. What may I do for you?'
'Well, I bought an expensive woman's electronic hair dryer for my Mother's birthday that is unopened and well over the Customs limits, and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through customs for me? Under your robes perhaps?'
'I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you: I will not lie.'
'With your honest face, Father, no one will question you.'
When they got to Customs, she let the priest go ahead of her.
The official asked, 'Father, do you have anything to declare?'
'From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare.'
The official thought this answer strange, so asked, 'And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?'
'I have a marvellous instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is, to date, unused.'
Roaring with laughter, the official said, 'Go ahead, Father. Next!'

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Раздел английского на учебном подсайте Би-би-си. Оригинальные и забавные методики для повторения и закрепления различных языковых навыков. Thanks to _юнга_Фред_

[показать]Переводы заявлений руководителей государств — дело ответственное. Здесь иногда приходится идти на компромисс: лучше держаться ближе к тексту, но стилистическая «цена» не должна быть слишком высокой. Предлагаемый ниже текст довольно типичен по лексике и стилистике. Перевод РИА «Новости» тоже довольно показателен.More

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1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.More!

May this birthday bring you life's real gifts, good health, friendship, and love. Happy Birthday Rucci! [показать]

[показать]1. Do Not Interfere In Others’ Business Unless Asked:
Most of us create our own problems by interfering too often in others’ affairs. We do so because somehow we have convinced ourselves that our way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic and those who do not conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to the right direction, our direction. This thinking denies the existence of individuality and consequently the existence of God.. God has created each one of us in a unique way. No two human beings can think or act in exactly the same way. All men or women act the way they do because God within them prompts them that way. Mind your own business and you will keep your peace.
More!

[показать]TRY IT :" - шепнула DREAM.
"Что? AGAIN? ? ? ? ! " - возмутился EXPERIENCE.
"Хе, снова BECAUSE OF меня)))" - улыбнулась REASON.
"Нет! BECAUSE OF меня! ! ! ! "- поспорила PRIDE.
"А MAYBE : не надо? " - пролепетала CARE.
" CARE, иди в ASS! " - гаркнула COURAGE.
"Я закрыта на ADVENTURE! " - отмазалась ASS.
"HERE I AM! " - объявила DECISION.
"А MAYBE лучше завтра? " - поинтересовалось DOUBT.
"Сегодня или NEVER! " - отрезало STUBBORNESS.
"THE MAIN THING только не как вчера! " - предупредила COMMONNESS.
"Вчерашнее не REPEAT " - успокоила STUPIDITY.
"Всё будет ANOTHER WAY! " - соврало FEELING.
"На что-то это LIKE. . " - задумалась MEMORY.
"Суки вы ALL :" - вставая и SHAKING OFF процедила сквозь зубы DREAM

[показать]The world is your mirror.
The good you find in others, is in you too.
The faults you find in others, are your faults as well.
After all, to recognize something you must know it.
The possibilities you see in others, are possible for you as well.
The beauty you see around you, is your beauty.
The world around you is a reflection, a mirror showing you the person you are.
To change your world, you must change yourself.
See the best in others, and you will be your best.
Give to others, and you will give to yourself.
Appreciate beauty, and you will be beautiful.
Admire creativity, and you will be creative.
Love, and you will be loved.
Seek to understand, and you will be understood.
Listen, and your voice will be heard.
Teach, and you will learn. (c)

[показать]A preacher concluded that his church was getting into very serious financial troubles. While checking the church storeroom, he discovered several cartons of new Bibles that had never been opened and distributed.
So at his Sunday sermon, he asked for three volunteers from the congregation who would be willing to sell the Bibles door-to-door for $10 each to raise the desperately-needed money for the church.
Jack, Paul and Louie all raised their hands to volunteer for the task.
The minister knew that Jack and Paul earned their living as salesmen and were likely capable of selling some Bibles. But he had serious doubts about Louie who was a local farmer, who had always kept to himself because he was embarrassed by his speech impediment. Poor Louis stuttered badly. But, not wanting to discourage Louis, the minister decided to let him try anyway.
He sent the three of them away with the back seat of their cars stacked with Bibles. He asked them to meet with him and report the results of their door-to-door selling efforts the following Sunday.
Anxious to find out how successful they were, the minister immediately asked Jack, 'Well, Jack, how did you make out selling our Bibles last week?'
Proudly handing the minister an envelope, Jack replied, 'Using my sales prowess, I was able to sell 20 Bibles, and here's the $200 I collected on behalf of the church.'
'Fine job, Jack!' The minister said, vigorously shaking his hand. 'You are indeed a fine salesman and the Church is indebted to you.'
Turning to Paul, 'And Paul, how many Bibles did you sell for the church last week?'
Paul, smiling and sticking out his chest, confidently replied, 'I am a professional salesman. I sold 28 bibles on behalf of the church, and here's $280 I collected.'
The minister responded, 'That's absolutely splendid, Paul. You are truly a professional salesman and the church is indebted to you.'
Apprehensively, the minister turned to Louie and said, 'And Louie, did you manage to sell any Bibles last week?' Louie silently offered the minister a large envelope.
The minister opened it and counted the contents. 'What is this?' the minister exclaimed. 'Louie, there's $3200 in here! Are you suggesting that you sold 320 Bibles for the church, door to door, in just one week?'
Louie just nodded. That's impossible!' both Jack and Paul said in unison. 'We are professional salesmen, yet you claim to have sold 10 times as many Bibles as we could...'
'Yes, this does seem unlikely,' the minister agreed. 'I think you'd better explain how you managed to accomplish this, Louie.'
Louie shrugged. 'I-I-I re-re-really do-do-don't kn-kn-know f-f-f-for sh-sh-sh-sure,' he stammered.
Impatiently, Peter interrupted. 'For crying out loud, Louie, just tell us what you said to them when they answered the door!'
'A-a-a-all I-I-I s-s-said wa-wa-was,' Louis replied, 'W-w-w-w-would y-y-y-you l-l-l-l-l-like t-t-to b-b-b-buy th-th-th-this b-b-b-b-bible F-f-for t-t-ten b-b-b-bucks ---o-o-o-or--- wo-wo-would yo-you j-j-j-just l-like m-m-me t-t-to st-st-stand h-h-here and r-r-r-r-r-read it t-to y-y-you??'

In London an old priest lay dying in the hospital. For years he had faithfully served the people of the nation's capital. He [показать] motioned for his nurse to come near.
"Yes, Father ?" said the nurse.
"I would really like to see Prime Minister and the Chancellor before I die", whispered the priest.
"I'll see what I can do, Father", replied the nurse.
The nurse sent the request to Parliament and waited for a response.
Soon the word arrived; Prime Minister Gordon Brown and Darling would be delighted to visit the priest.
As they went to the hospital, Gordon commented to Darling, "I don't know why the old priest wants to see us, but it will certainly will help our images and might even get me re~elected Prime Minister. After all, I'm IN IT TO WIN IT".
Darling agreed that it was a good thing.
When they arrived at the priest's room, the priest took Gordon's hand in his right hand and Alistair's hand in his left.
There was silence and a look of serenity on the old priest's face.
Finally Gordon spoke. "Father, of all the people you could have chosen, why did you choose us to be with you as you near the end ?"
The old priest slowly replied, "I have always tried to pattern my life after our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ."
"Amen", said Gordon. "Amen", said Alistair.
The old priest continued, "Jesus died between two lying thieves; I would like to do the same."

[показать]A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tires or testicles, you're going to have trouble with it.
(Women's restroom - Dick's Last Resort: Dallas , Texas )

At the feast of ego, everyone leaves hungry.
(Bentley's House of Coffee and Tea: Tucson , Arizona )

Beauty is only a light switch away.
(Perkins Library - Duke University : Durham , North Carolina .)
more

SOME parents can be cruel – or down right stupid – when naming their kids. [показать]
SUE AGE - Born Glasgow, 1849.
PETER PIDDLE - Baptized Fowey, Cornwall, 1649.
ENEMA BOTTOMLEY WOOD - Died Huddersfield, 1904.
SEYMOUR BUST - Born Halstead, Essex, 1841.
PLEASANT TITTY - Baptized Margate, Kent, 1768.
(She was named after her mom — so the family had a pair of Pleasant Tittys.)
more

[показать]The old man placed order for one hamburger, French fries and a drink. He unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half, placing one half in front of his wife. He then carefully counted out the French fries, dividing them into two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife.
He took a sip of the drink, his wife took a sip and then set the cup down between them . As he began to eat his few bites of hamburger, the people around them were looking over and whispering.
Obviously they were thinking, 'That poor old couple - all they can afford is one meal for the two of them.'
As the man began to eat his fries a young man came to the table and politely offered to buy another meal for the old couple. The old man said, they were just fine - they were used to sharing everything..
People closer to the table noticed the little old lady hadn't eaten a bite. She sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally taking turns sipping the drink.
more

A blonde hurried into the emergency room late one night with the tip of her index finger shot off. 'How did this happen?' the emergency room doctor asked her. 'Well, I was trying to commit suicide,' the blonde replied. 'What?' sputtered the doctor. 'You tried to commit suicide by shooting off your finger?' 'No, Silly' the blonde said. 'First I put the gun to my chest, and then I thought, 'I just paid $6,000.00 for these
implants. I'm not shooting myself in the chest.' 'So then?' asked the doctor. 'Then I put the gun in my mouth, and I thought, 'I just paid $3,000.00 to get my teeth straightened. I'm not shooting myself in the mouth.' 'So then?' 'Then I put the gun to my ear, and I thought: 'This is going to make a loud noise. So I put my finger in my other ear before I pulled the trigger.

[показать]Как правильно перевести сочетания:
family gatherings
stable upbringing
physical resembance

  [показать]Не знаю, нужно ли вам это. Но все таки - тайный язык интернет-конференций или же сокращения.
AAMOF
As A Matter Of Fact
По существу дела, фактически

ADN
Any day now
В любое время
Когда угодно

AFAIK
As Far As I Know
На сколько я знаю
More

[показать]As cool as a cucumber - совершенно спокойный
as easy as apple pie - проще простого
as flat as a pancake - совершенно плоский
as nutty as a fruitcake - сошедший с ума, спятивший
as red as a cherry - ярко-красный
сompare apples and oranges - как небо и земля
upset smb's plans - расстроить чьи-либо планы
upset smb's applecart - спутать карты
polish the apple - подлизоваться, льстить
rotten to the core - гнилой, испорченный человек
bad apple - испорченный человек
rotten apple - испорченный, плохой человек
apple of one's eye - очень любимый, зеница ока
hill of beans - пустяки
spill the beans - выдать секрет, проболтаться, раскрыть все карты
not worth a hill of beans - ничего не стоящий, не имеющий значения
not know beans about (someone or something) - ничего не смыслить, понимать в чем-то
full of beans - горячий, живой, в приподнятом настроении
know which side one's bread is buttered - быть себе на уме
half-baked - непродуманный, сырой, поверхностный
half a loaf is better than none - лучше синица в руках, чем журавль в облаках
grist for the mill - что-то, что дает преимущество или приносит прибыль
greatest thing since sliced bread - самая потрясающая, замечательная вещь
bread and water - сажать на хлеб и воду
bread and butter - средства к существованию, жизненно необходимый, насущный
as warm as toast - теплый, приятный, уютный
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