may be one day  i'll need to take a retrospective of my life and perhaps, it would be fukn liru who will givitome)

well, what to say first.. ahhhh, yea! THE FIRST!
I'M A GRADUATED BACHELAUR OF APPLYING MATHS AND PHYSICS.

get this, u all!)) 
yep, im not Agronom, the son of Agronom, anymore :D
but it's still fukin hard to go out from russia with my lulzy attestate, with average mark lower than 3.5 =/
even although i have an EXCELLENT marked diploma work.
so now i have to pass exams and enter the magistrate divison. still here in this fukin Sin-Damnedburg.
but this won't be a problem, sure.

Next.

im fukin tired.
tired of sin-city, tired of these sin-people.
im pushed out like a lemon with all these state exams, diploma, and tattoo-convention at the same time.
suspensions, bod mods.. concurency. this business war looks very bad for me. especially for my nerves.
im thinking of going to novgorod to my granpa, to a country house.
hope to fing there some physical job - just to relax my brains. i need it very much. ohh all these stresses..

what else.

Im still lookin forward to go to the europe for some short time this summer.
the hope dies last, huh?
Yes, she does.
The absolute minimum is to visit Ukraine. and may be seaside.. 
oh my dreams have suddenly boiled out from my skull)) 

okay, i think this is everything i wanted to say right now.
as it is used to say, 'u can get the details in PM' :D

well goodluk u, asses! ;P

PS
yea, becoz of i have got the diploma, i've reached my main goal at this period of life, so now im in free flight. 
i have nothing to do right now. need to make a masterplan, surely. 
but now let me to relax for sometime, to keep myself as a vegetable))
and tommorrow i'll begin the actions.
U all know me, i never sit doing nothing. i mean new me :D not that pessimitic veg which was me 0.5-1 yrs ago))

And yes, our #Leeds Suspensions project is still devoloping. i've got some money to invest in. so we wilbe ready for superactuons soon ;)

see ya. (and get suspended by #Leeds! ;)))

this life surprises me more and more.
and more pleasantly than awfully.
may be one person was really right who'd made a statement that life doesn't accept a person who doesn't accept life.
i love this life and she loves me }:]
this is the only my truelove (if not to speak about quake3, linux, overfried thin blond nice chicks, and zhdislav beksinski pictures :D)

well, moscaw is comming soon, airplane ticket are heating my soul) the last days of alcohol drinking, before our petersburg tattoo convention)
and yeeep it would start a time of my new modifications }:] at least i'll redo my subdermal implants of left forearm. and may be smth more }:))

but first i should accomplish performance with #Leeds on april, 30th.
it is rather strange feeling - to start so deeply buried show-project after 2 years of misactivity (in this key i mean of course)
anyway, the show must go on and my story is gotta blow :D
actually, this is all i wanted to say 8)
dont worry be happy ;)

one more shot from 'vampyre promenade II' :D

- ihola amigos! how was the show?
- hey, dumbass, u were on the scene and played ur role in right way! but why do u ask?! O_o
- eeemm.. i was so fukin drunk that i don't remember how did i rise on the scene...
moreover, i remember nothing between 4 and 11 pm..
- O_O so.. u don't remember how did u kiss with several girls?..
- O_O it seems that not.. :((
- foooh.. fine! ^^
- =/


this is how one should drink :DD
be drunk as pig but always do ur job well!
of course, if u're andersson))

wheh, as anyone of u, my anonimous readerz, could decide - according to my damn fukin rare posts  in the recent time - i'm damn fukin fine.

yep, dear. as it is common for humans, we don't describe our happiness, we decribe only our pain and sufferings.
as i'd already said somewhere, i'm absolutely usual man, like u and like him, and like her (but still more alike him, differing to her :)))
the only our difference is that im still able to dream and to move to gain my dream.
of course it is not for everybody, there re some exceptions which are proving this simple rule)

Well.. whatz about me.

I'm still workin in Total Ink as bod mod artist, i'm writing the diploma in the university (fuck yea, it's the last, 4th grade, and i'llget the bachelour degree after passin last exams on summer), and i'm busy in two show-units.
I should say, this takes damn lot of my free time (no, smtms i have a few to meet my friends, but these moments happen rarely..)

and this is why i've decided to forbid all the relations wiz girls. i can easily forgot about my businesses followwing my emotions, so better i wouldn't even start em.
Of course i don't exclude havin relations, but practically no one girl could accept my conditions, i guess))
so whether i will find some a chick who will help me to move to my dream and, vice versa, who will be helped by me, without any promises and 'eternal love' :DD
or i'll stay alone. 
As it is said, the worst man is one who couldn't bring fun to himself by himself))
im not the worst :D
i lov.. emmm.... not loneliness but... dunno how to say. i lov to be single, may be)
i dont prefer this state, but now it is the best my choice)
im too tired to sacrifice my businesses 9= my future) n honour of stupid feelings which give me nothing, i cant even say that i have enjoyed last relations. 

So now im socialising and workin on my future.
sure, this period of my life will efine my future in a high rate degree.

Also, i have some probabilities to travel a littl bit in may - the first target is moscaw and the second one may become kiev.
im crossing fingers in honour to get all this. i had never been in kiev. it is the most proper time.
and summer promises me a trip to Ankara, Turkey. 
Turkish BME-society needz my help! :DD So, who knows... i keep my fingers crossed about it))

so this is how i am.
as u can c, everything is ok and there's nothing to worry about.
hope, i'll find some time to turn back to u, my blog, and to write some details about my life and thoughts.

PS
i've passed laboratory today. it was funny - i'd sent three laboratory works reports to my teacher via email.
The joke was that unexpectedly, i'd sent one of that three reports written in russian and another two - in english :DD
it is a habit to write everything in eng)
but i should say this my  teacher was really good and she got all three reports passed :DD
it is respectful)

woah.
be what will be.
the show must go on!

Well..
It's time to draw a deadline under my relations with girls from moscaw.
It's enough, i'm fed with this.

So... The new goal is Ankara!
Hello Turkey! Andersson is gonna! Woohooo!

Ps
turkish girls re not too beautiful but not worse than any of my girl from moscaw XD
Fukk, i've talked about nothin with Pe until 4 o'clock inspite of i have to study physics
><
im a hopeless idiot :DD

is it common for russian youth to communicate, writing one half of message in espanola and the second half - in english?)))

well, now i'd approached a significant border in my life.
and overcome it.

suddenly i've got understand that my life have changed dramatically.
usually ppl name it 'to become adult'.
of course in value of social adaptation.
but it doesn't any matter.

as one well known artist said, 'The show must go on!'
and it goes on.
the only new fact is that i'd just realised some its new aspects and hidden rules and hints.
and my Show will go on, inspite of everything.

and now i need to do my work.
i have damn lot things to do and the time is not my allie anymore :(
can't say it makes me regreting (vice versa), but it invests a few new rules into the game.
so..
Murphy was an optimist.

Bless me.

it's time to put a line.

my life is practically broken and i was very close to my aim.
anyway, what's done is done, and i will never regret about anything. i'd counted a great plan.
and the risk was very high. the bet was all my life, of course. No, i don't mean my physical life, i speak just about how do i live. but i had better bet my own life..

it was the ideal plan. to provocate a war. and whoever win, i would win too. even morethan anyone else.
It was not the usual war between two groups of people. it was a war between two people.
The first one was me and the second one was... me.

Where do u think the Ideal enemy will hide?
The right answer is - he will hide in the place where u will never look for him.
Brilliant, fellows! I'm speaking about your heads. Your small, big, pretty, ugly, smart, stupid, hairful, bold, average, but, be sure, your LOVELY heads.

Oghh, our ego!.. It is the most sacred thing for everybody in his life! Our own Ego is the only our God and the only our Judge! No one is allowed to argue with our Ego and no one is allowed even to see it! This is really damn scareful and grand majestic feature of any human being! There is nothing else sacred in our life, except the Ego which is always whispering us what should we do, what should we think... what should we feel!..
I had never met more fearful, immortal and invincible opponent than our Ego! I can even kiss the ground before this phenomenon! I can't even beleive that it is the production of evolution of stupid human race!..

So, Ego. Yes, it sits inside our heads. It controls our mind. But we are not only our Ego.
We are made of willings, ambitions, wishes, fears, habits, needs and so on by natural and social institutes.
And only this makes us what we are. We could be everything we want be, if only our physycal statement could allow this.
But here we have one problem. Our Ego... it is well hidden under all these features which we had gained after we were born. but Our Ego is the same for everybody. We are all the same. Could u understand it?
Ego has a very few features... i can even say it is the Basis of priorities. And nothing more. Terms Ego and Individuality are unsuitable for each other.
And our Ego stays the most dangerous enemy. Becouse it is the only whom we can beleive without any provement. We think that our Ego is Our Nature. our Inside. But actually, it is our Instinct and nothing more.

And how do u think, what was my ideal plan?

"The worst his mistake and the best his achievement was to set himself in a variance with himself." (A. Andersson)

Yes, fellows, this is what' i've done.
I did it.

It was a very hard step to me. IT WAS DAMN HELL HARD. But i'd passed, and i've got it.
The process, which had began two years ago, had been finished.
I'd splitted myself from my Ego.
And, how it was expected, my Ego had started a War. No one wants to lose his physical body (or may be even more than only body but being)
I was ready.
Here i should note that here the term "I" doesn't mean my Ego and it doesn't mean the composition of my features gained from the society. Here it means some transveral logical-intuitve abstracted from the situation being i could even explain.
"I" am some kind of observer. But.. I could not only observe.  I could manipulate too.

So the war had begun. It is useless to explain, how had i splitted me from me here, becouse it is out of topic now. But nevertheless, war was started and the Rubicon had already been overcome.
The plan was ideal.. And both of opponents had a glorious fight. I had no preferences to anyone's win.
But something had gone in a wrong way.
At one moment my powers got over.

And what do i have now?
I have a splitted psychics, which would never gain the compromiss between its dual beings.
I have no innersoul resources to continue this war to the knife.
Both irreconsilable opponents are weak, but fallen in hatred to each other. And they are both still alive.

My plan had failed. I've got a DAMN USUAL for me mistake. Some things are doomed to be repeated, and this case is a canonic one. I'd triggered a backflash again.
My mistake was in my countings. I was never been able to count my powers well. I whether spread it too wide, or to few.
I want to get everything and at the same time.
This is my main mistake. I'm twenty (soon 21) years old, but i still couldn't understand this right rule of this life.. or i couldn't break it.

All my life is dedicated to glory.
I want to become famous. To become a hero.
I always wanted. From the

Well..
it's time to put a final dot in my previous life.

Changes.. yes. the're so painful.
BUT SO SWEET!

What do u know about dream?
What is your dream? Do u have it? 
How far could u go to gain it? How much can u abandon yourself?

Some dreams require to pay more than usual man or woman could even imagine.
My dream does.
I should change. I should abandon myself, but save my personality at the same time.
And i will change.
I've droped a lot of tears while having accepted this decision. It is really difficult - to forget yourself. To ERASE YOURSELF.
Partially.. But.. How could u imagine without a finger, for example?

AHAHA, AND I COULD!!!!!
Sure, i'll cut it, nevertheless! After two years of thinking.. Im ready to lose a part of me in honour of my dream!
This is my symbolism feature. This act will be the greatest symbolic act in my life i think. And it would be DAMN TOTALLY deliberate action.

Now i know what should i change. And i'd already started to do it.
Let it be CHANGES!!!.... And let it be Loki, Flammy and their Dream!.. And let the world write the Story about our Love!
Now i'm ready to do this sacrifice. I'll destroy everything which will make obstackles to my moving to my Dream.
Even it would be me. ESPECIALLY if it would be me.

The first steps are already done.
Every long way one thousand miles length begins with a one tiny step.
And sure, i wouldn't move through this hard way alone.
Great thanks for u, my lovely Flammy for everything u've done for me.

This is the myphological Eternal Engine. Me and You. 
We'll develop each other till we'll go to our Far Dreams and our common Dream.

God bless us. And maybe, one day we'll bless the God.

i understand that i'd already reach A GREAT decision in my life.

i have a person who really could be my second part in the whole life. Yes, i speak about her)

a person who loves me, and the object of my love.

i have TRUE friends, including my fake family (which is not so fake!), who will always support me and i love them.

i have good parents who love me too and they will always support me more than anybody else (except my lovely F of course)

mtt, every new days lets me understand that im becoming a real authority as a master inside my subculture.

all this done work was not useless at all!

i can say easily im really happy now..

but..

It is no more than only the beginning of a great story! (c)

Our great story!

thank u all, my friends, my bg, my relatives. . .

i will never be myself without u.

:(( 

REQUEST
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Subject:
Связь - зона покрытия
Message:
КАКОГО ХРЕНА?! я абонент теле2 уже ЧЕТЫРЕ ГОДА, практически с основания оператора, но теле2 ещё ни разу так по-свински не поступал!
в ЦЕНТРЕ ГОРОДА (Басков переулок, д.10) у меня на работе телефон вдруг перестал (недели 2 назад) ловить связь (все пожелания проверить телефон - в лес; уже сделано и с ним всё в порядке)
рабочее помещение подвального типа; в принципе связь и раньше была только на подоконниках, НО ТЕПЕРЬ ПОЧЕМУ-ТО её ВООБЩЕ на территории офиса нет.
Так что прошу решить проблему (хоть ретранслятор нам у дверей ставьте, мне неважно)
в противном случае мне придётся сменить оператора.
Name:
Арсений
Email: painm@yandex.ru
Телефон:
8904 6420715
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REPLY
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Добрый день, Арсений.
Спасибо за Ваше обращение!
Сожалею, что ситуация доставляет Вам неудобство.
Временное ухудшение качества связи в указанном районе связано с отключением базовой станции в связи со строительными работами, что приводит к увеличению нагрузки на соседние базовые станции и уменьшению уровня сигнала.
Ваше замечание передано в техническую службу.
От лица компании приношу извинения за временные неудобства. В качестве некоторой компенсации на счет Вашего телефона зачислена сумма в размере 20 рублей. (<---- PIZDEC!!!! 20!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. - author)
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