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1. Thou shalt pay more to appear poor. You'll pay more for clothes that have that worn look. **
Writes Lee: "We buy peasant blouses at faux-boho Anthropologie because we want to look like we churn butter on a farm in Provence."

2. Thou shalt covet useless utility. Who needs shirts with hoods, sleeveless polar fleece, the multitude of cargo pants pockets and extra buckles, zippers, Velcro closures, straps and strings?

3. Thou shalt own minutely differing variations of the same thing. Doesn't everyone need a pair of sneakers for running, a pair for walking, a pair for shopping, a pair for going out, a pair for jeans and a pair for shorts?

4. Thou shalt believe submissively in the fashion label's reach. Buy the label, adopt the branded lifestyle. Do you prefer the world of Ralph Lauren, Calvin Klein, Banana Republic, Eddie Bauer, Donna Karan, Liz Claiborne, Nautica or Versace?

5. Thou shalt require validation of thine own stylishness. If the people who see you don't ooh and aah, it could be time for a new wardrobe.

6. Thou shalt dress vicariously through thy children and pets. As we dress to excess, so do many of our kids. And (gulp), increasingly, our pets. Hermes, Louis Vuitton, Prada, Salvatore Ferragamo and Gucci have lines of pet products.

7. Thou shalt feign athleticism. Most of our lives may take place between the kitchen, TV and work cubicle, but boy do we want to dress like athletes and pro sports stars!

8. Thou shalt be a walking billboard. From the Polo emblem and A/X on Armani Exchange T-shirts to the Nike swoosh, logomania dominates current fashions as a proud badge of membership.

9. Thou shalt care about Paris Hilton's Gaultier micromini.
*Okay, Michelle, you win. Who is Paris Hilton? She (and sister Nicky) are part of
the Junior Jet-setter crew of young socialites and "IT girls" whose photos dominate the party scenes filling the pages of Vogue and other fashionista magazines. The Tampa Bay area may be out of the A-list fashion loop, but we sure like to ogle the beautiful people.

10. Thou shalt want without seeing. Sell fashions by pitching ads that don't show the product. Get it? Fashion ads, once strange enough, are getting more bizarre. But the same rule holds: Sex sells. Just close your eyes and buy.