thinking
31-08-2006 03:50
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can't sleep.. out of pills.. ah.. im thinking too much again.. doubting.. asking myself idiotic questions about the recent past.. i think Tim was (is?) ashamed of me.. strange guilt attacks me when i let these thoughts in.. it's like two voices are yelling, competing, in my mind.. who's right?
then it all vanishes.. and the thoughts about Tim's present condition return.. squezing out all hope and optimism.. and then it's gone again.. and i see a bright, happy future.. perhaps too happy to be realistic.. a future about me and him.. a future for a lifetime..he would run if he knew.. so im keeping it for myself.. for daydreaming.. itty-bitty-pretty illusions.
вверх^
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can't sleep.. out of pills.. ah.. im thinking too much again.. doubting.. asking myself idiotic questions about the recent past.. i think Tim was (is?) ashamed of me.. strange guilt attacks me when i let these thoughts in.. it's like two voices are yelling, competing, in my mind.. who's right?
then it all vanishes.. and the thoughts about Tim's present condition return.. squezing out all hope and optimism.. and then it's gone again.. and i see a bright, happy future.. perhaps too happy to be realistic.. a future about me and him.. a future for a lifetime..he would run if he knew.. so im keeping it for myself.. for daydreaming.. itty-bitty-pretty illusions.
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Дневник thinking | Katyuha - It would be so nice if something made sense for a change... |
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