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24-02-2006 06:00
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How to Be a Lazy College Student
So, you want to learn how to become a lazy bum? Looks like you have found the right page.
Steps
Enroll in a college.
Sign up for classes.
Even though you have signed up for classes, make sure you only attend less than half of them.
Following the precedent in step three, make sure not to wake up before 11 AM at the earliest.
Lay around your dorm room (or wherever you live) all day. Getting dressed is not an option.
Eat. Eat everything in sight. Wearing food on your clothing is okay.
Showering is optional.
Even though you are being "lazy," it is okay to go to parties. In fact, you should party as much as possible.
Disregard people when they tell you that you are wasting your life.
You must not graduate in four years, ten is more acceptable.
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