And Isn't it Ironic? TO MY FANS AGAIN .
I am very sorry.
I was scared to logg in .Because i was apsent for some time, or still am it a bit .

Well...it was not really my fault .Not in the end .Ah well i guess everybody would judge like he is .as usal.same shit as as always.

Well.
The week before last friday horrible crime happened to me .every day . every day.no time rest .

Well...then on june 1th It killed me nearly.
It was my Mums , Sakis and Yves fear...that safed my live at last .
They all live far from me and couldn´t be sure with what they would do .
I was out of any reach .phone or so on .

They called police.Yes, and i layed in my room and was good as dead.

They took me to hospital.Reanimated one day.....4 days in comatic status followed.

And now...well...I am half way nack again and and writing to you .

Why i do thats ? This "Selfdestruction of an idol"?

Don´t know.maybe only caus i have always been what i have been .
No idea what name it ihas.
Me.

And i was asked by you .You get the Answer here.

This is all reason for the blog.

I love you .
If you want to thank anyone that i am still alive now...thank saki, my mum and yves...Not me.Please not me.

Yours Luminor

That I would be good even if I did nothing .

That I would be good even if I got the thumbs down .

That I would be good. If I get and stayed ..sick ?
That I would be good .Even if i was drunken and raped?

That I would be fine. Even even if I went bankrupt ?

That I would be good if I lost my hair and my youth .
That I would be great if I was no longer great ?

That I would be grand .....
if I was not hungering.

That I would be loved .Even when I´m not myself ?

That I would be good .Even when I am overwhelmed?

That I would be loved... even when lost control?

That I would be good even if I was clingy?

That I would be good .
Even if I lost sanity .

That I would be good.

WHether in live...or in death?

Why.Just why.....why.