Maybe you will find the following article funny. It was prepared for
Mr.G.Bush, American president, and published in one of central newspapers!
Bush is coming in England this week.
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THE IDIOT'S GUIDE TO GREAT BRITAIN Nov 17 2003


That's this itty bitty country due east of the States where folks talk
kinda weird, Mr President

By Ruki Sayid And Damien Fletcher


1, LONDON is the capital of the UK which is an independent country and not
your 51st State.

2, OUR Sovereign is Queen Elizabeth II (that's pronounced second not
eleven). You must not put your arm around her and call her "honey" or "l'il
lady". She is to be addressed as "Your Majesty" or "Ma'am" at all times.

3, HER eldest son is called Prince Charles not "Chuck". Don't talk to him
about butlers, valets or ask him if he's seen any good videos.

4, WHEN you sit down to a state banquet you use the cutlery starting from
the outside. Big Mac and fries won't be on the menu.

5, THE RAF won the Battle of Britain not Tom Cruise or Bruce Willis.

6, WE live in a democracy and as such have the right to demonstrate so if
your route is lined with thousands of anti-war protesters, don't ask for
them to be extradited to Camp X-ray.

7, WE say trousers not pants - unless of course we are referring to your
foreign policy.

8, WILLIAM Shakespeare, our greatest playwright, wrote Romeo and Juliet,
not Zefferelli. Don't ask to meet Will - he's dead.

9, BE sure to register for the congestion charge when your motorcade drives
through London or mayor Ken Livingstone will hit you with a ё40 fine for
every car.

10, WE put milk in our tea, not ice, have toast not waffles for breakfast
and walk on the pavement not the sidewalk.

Have a nice day...not!