So what is wrong with a little of talking to yourself?
Especially when it involves bad english, total lack of any writing talent and a glass of cheap wine in hand?
I quite frankly believe its quite therapeutic,,, especially if anonymity is maintained, something like confining in strangers.
Best part is that somewhere deep inside theres a well hidden, (although that becomes more and more distorted with each glass as u begin to speak to individuals) belief that someday, someone may actually read this. Obviously that is the one that matters... or the ones that matter. chances are though by time they will, shall that day come, they would be well forgiven and better yet forgotten.
There is the ironic part though, you sweat, you pant u form letters into words into sentences to form a coherent (or so it appears to you) quality piece of writing. now all this in your head has a total meaning. That is that once that someone, or someones come across this splendid piece of work everything in their brains would somehow rearrange and come to a complete sync with your feelings and thoughts without much communication. Suddenly they would have that winged woman over their head vigorously swinging her arms in the air and explaining precisely and accurately everything you would want them to understand in their own language. And naturally they would fall on their knees or run to store and head ur way with a bottle of Jack.
No.
You would never read this.
I am talkin to you because Im lonely.

Something just caught my eye, an old entry
I need someone to hold me tight, for eternity
to hold me tight when my head goes wham and i cant deal with myself anymore..
someone to be able to face my demons..
u cant do that can u...
u cant acknowledge them even now can u?
and i miss being the one and only for the entire eternity and after... thats not the case either now is it?
lol...
how much of urself have u lost??????