This is for all of you out there who have kids: I do not. In fact, I hate kids for the most part. Given the fact that you talk about kids all the time to those of without is enought to drive one insane. We all know you had a life before you had them, so I am confident you can think of something to talk about other than little Timmy or precious Cythia. For example, when you ask me how I am doing, and I respond that I've just contracted the bird flu and have not long to live - I could give a shit about the time little Tommy was sick with a cold and he just looked so cute with his snotty little nose. If I say that I am going to some concert, I sure as hell do not want to hear about how your little heathen can sing all the songs to Blues Clues. In fact, most other people could give a rat's ass about your little spawn of Satan - they just are to polite not to strangle you. I however, am not.
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