A list of Helpful Office Sayings.

- I don't know what your problem is but I bet it's hard to pronounce.
- I see you have set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
- I'm really easy to get along with as soon as people learn to worship me.
- I'll try to be nicer if your try to be smarter.
- I don't work here I am a consultant.
- You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
- The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you are an artist.
- I'm out of my mind but feel free to leave a message.
- It sounds like English but I don't understand a word you are saying.
- I am not being rude. You are just being insignificant.
- It's a thankless job, but I have a lot of karma to burn off.
- You sound reasonable. Time to up the medication.