feelings
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so wants new? not much........
as usual lots of work to do, cause its the end of semester.....
i am helping my father with his little business and because of that i feel kind of important, now he calles me and asks my opinion, what to do.......
well not really opinion, but rather a statement and and order to do that for him...
hehe, but i still feel important....... So its cool, really,,,,,
i decided not to cut my hair.........
lol, i am out, my friend Qina, just called me and we are going to the lunch....yes!!!

just not a very good day, i feel like crap....
my both sisters in law are getting married, one is older and another one is younger than me, and i am still single...........
i don't even have a boyfriend, whats wrong with me?
why can't i find someone and get married? why don't guys like me?
now i feel the pressure from then, now i know that they will talk about me as of old maide.....i guess they are happy now,,,,,,,,i hate my relatives/..............
lets them be happy and get married......i will be on my on.....face it, i don't have someone to marry..................
maybe one day, i will laugh back at them...............
i am so lonely.........
oh well, learn how to deal with it........................

"(In funny old lady voice) Hello, you have reached the ----family and we can not come to the phone right now. Please leave your name, phone number, short message, social security number, and credit card number and we will call you when we're done shopping."

Hi. This is John:
If you are the phone company, I already sent the money.
If you are my parents, please send money.
If you are my financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money.
If you are my friends, you owe me money.
If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.

Hi. I'm home right now, I'm just screening my calls. So start talking and if you're someone I want to speak with I'll pick up the phone. Otherwise, well, what can I say?

This is you-know who. We are you-know-where. Leave your you-know-what and we'll get back you-know-when.

(From Japanese friend): He-lo! This is Sa-to, If you leave message, I call you soon. If you leave "sexy" message I call sooner!

Thank you for calling Soviet Embassy. No KG... Er, no diplomats are able to answer phone, so at sound of capitalist tone, leave name, telephone number, and short description of secrets you wish to sell .

I can't come to the phone now, so if, well, actually, I CAN come to the
phone now, I mean, like, I'm at the phone NOW, recording this message,
but I'm doing this NOW, while you're listening to it LATER, except for
you I guess it's NOW, like, when you're listening to it... I mean,
like, wait, gosh. This is so confusing.

" ... любовь - это лотеpея, в котоpой
выигpавшему достается смеpть! Повеpьте
мне, любезный д'Аpтаньян, вам очень
повезло, что вы пpоигpали. Пpоигpывайте
всегда - таков мой совет..."

different icons

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- Вчера в Москву прилетели Backstreet boys, ночью они встретились с Tverskay street girls!

- А в Кабардино-Балкарии состоялся концерт Мэрлина Мэнсона! Такого ужаса… Мэрлин Мэнсон давно не видел!

- Я сегодня проснулся, смотрю: что-то не то! Главное, "Что-то не то" тоже проснулось: "Хочу кофе! Хочу кофе!"

- МинЗдрав меня предупреждал:
- Курение опасно для Вашего здоровья!
- А чтение мелких надписей на сигаретных пачках не опасно для моего зрения?..

- А знаете, как в лесу узнать, где юг? Надо посмотреть на дерево. Если дерево- пальма, то юг -уже здесь!

- - Который час?
- В Петербурге часы не нужны! Через каждые 15 минут - ограбления, а через 30 - изнасилования

today was my last day of teaching the class..... and i am so happy its over, i seems like i should be sad , but no, , i am happy.......
i can't say i had a great experince, but i sure i did improve myself in speech, and thats the only goal that i had originally...............!
So i am good! i did what i wanted, eventhrough it was not so much fun........
today we had a party and my partner didn't even shown up........
ah, hell with him.................it's even better that way, dont' want to see him.....
and the party sucked! i had to spend $6 on cookies and candies....
or should i say for nothing.........i didn't like the food that was there, too much junk.. nothing tasty like
ah , but now i can say what its like to teach,........ been there, saw that.....
i think its also the weather that has an affect on me, it dark and ready to rain..... i can't wait untill the dance class...........
and i though the party would be fun, i had such a great plants on it!
i thought i would dance, laugh , be in a center of attention, hehe but decided to play some stupid game , something about porn star......oh my, where is it all leading?
well, i did my part!
i said goodbye to them and went out the door...

damn , i feel bored......
i am so bored, i got nothing to do......
should i go to that suck party or not?
thats the question...........
i know it's going to be borring, but i am bored already, so it can't be more boring than it is already,,,,,,,,,i take my words back, yes it can..............maybe........i don't know......if i go , i have to go out and buy something, but what shell i buy? i got no ideas.......i don't know what to do......i bet not everyone will come, ah , only those that i don't feel like seeing today.......i don't feel comfortable around them. eh,,eh,,eh..
so i just gave a speech in my business class, and it was ok.........my partners weren't great, they were BORING , maybe that why i am bored right now?, but than it went ok, i think we won that debate,....ok
i will go
p.s. my friend is killing me like a love ninja, she keeps on telling how many boys now fall in love with her, da! is it true, or just a fantasy? i always want to say to her: "HOney , are you serious? than why when we both went to high school i 've never seen a boy around you?"
damn, i am so pretty today, and bored, and a little bit jelous\
but it will go away, once i start dancing today, and there is a whole FREE WEEK AHAID OF ME, yep , yep.........
later

i am upset
all classes that i wanted to take are closed, now i have to take all that crap with the worth teachers of the school.......crap, damn.......
why me?
i deffinately need to sign up to some team so i could register earlier,
i just don't know to which one, i am so shy and can't do anything.......
eh, ah,....nothing is left but crap.....
its always like that with me.................................................................................

so whats going on, not much?
i am foof of midterms and exams...........i can't wait untill the end of semester.........
and all the classes that i want to take next semester are almost closed and my chances are 0.00000000001% , damn
ne vezet tak to polnoi..............
ny tipa vipisala sebe two new magazines : teen people and car manual, can't wait to read they, i hope they are fun, more fun that college books..........
so far i am planning to go somewhere on thanksgiving holidays, but i doubt about that, since its the last week of semester and finals are coming, scary things.... i so much don't want to take them, eh, eh,...what can i do,........today i saw one of my last year class freshment, he is taking 6 classes and has a job.......man, i feel sorry for my self........AND I THOUGH I WAS WORKING TOO HARD.........now , i feel like i doing nothing compaired to him........
p.s. eh, where are you my prince on a white jaguar?

today my girlfriend called me........
today i felt like i finaly had more fun than she did.........
ah, live is not over, smile........


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today was a beautiful day
i went to the smash concert and first i didn't like it but i just LOVe their last song
rich boy, o man they got me dancing, i so want to go to club
man , thats it i am going to my fro seminar party and i WILL dance, no matter what,
c'mon when i danced last year, go taped me so i am not that bad
and i go one guy attention. and girl
yap , i will definately gona get my class attention, no matter what, i will dance and i will rock.........yap , lets the party begin and always smile...........
oh yeah those days alone at home without my parents weren't so bad, i kept looking at the door ,cause i not used to stay alone, scary cat
i have to go to club, i want dance...............
dance, dance , dance...................

so today was my first interview day
and i think i blew it, the lady said " we will call you" and that means sorry, honey...
ah , but i got some experience, and lost $2 on metro card:(

finaly , its thursday......
i am so tired and i have to write this big essay.....
yesterday was a hard day....
besides my cat bited me....rr
i must learn how to protect myslef against him, or simply castrate him......
don't want to do that, even throw he is a cat, i still love him....
my dance class starts in 2 weeks , i cant wait
and my fro class ends in 2 more sessions, i can't wait for that either...
it went from good to discussting........eh
i shell never teach again...........
maybe only for the seek fro.....
will see, i plan that next semester.........
talking about next semester, damn its so hard to register.......in our days........

at some point i feel like i hate my best friend......
she's got nothing , but pretends like she is a queen..........
damn, i should give her a mirror for her birthday...........
anyway.............................
today i decided that my minor is going to be communications........
yes, i am going public..............to speak up my mind and thoughts......
oh, maybe it would be better to hold them inside instead.........hehe
today i know, my lit professor is totaly gay...........and it gets on my nerves.

finaly my computer works................
i had to install my windows all over again..........
this damn computer never works properly...........
oh yeah and about reunion, it sucked! ...........
it was not fun, all through some people were happy to see me , i could feel that, but.......i didn't like it....
its halloween today, and i am studing literature, i am reading a very scary story for my class, i almost cryed over that story, so sad and unrealisting, at some point, but the theme was very very sad......
don't want to talk about it ........
anymore, i feel sad.....
it the story that made me feel that way

today is schudeled freshemans reunion in my school........
today i am going to see them all once again, Da! i see most of them every day...
but the free food will be provided there.. this is my favorite part of the event, what ? i am hungry , and i just had a difficult test in my business class.....i was so nervous and stress out that i need food.......
i promise to write how it went later, cause now i have to go to this event and pretend like i am engoying it, oh did i say its mandatory?? oh yes it is.. which means i HAVE to enjoy it......damn...and no drinks....pure fun/ morals would i say.........
ah will see..........
p.s. i cut my bankes , now i think i look cuter........
yep yep
hehe

am I the only one who believes in faith and relationships?
am I the only one who lives in a perfect word?
well i know that nothing is perfect, but todays discussion in my class totaly crushed me, i am so frustrated right now, i am so mad, damn, i need to talk to someone. Right i finished teaching my class or should i say , attention MY OWN class, i came to the lab to write my feelings, i met Nancy on my way and talked alitte bit i couldn't tell her how i feel right now, horrible, i am totaly down............
. All i did in class i watched how my two parters gone crasy ,screaming at each other aobut sexual herrastment topic..... I didn't say a word cause i was afraid to get involve.........it was discussing, they were screaming out of their lungs provings what is a sexual herrastment and what is not.......so discussting......i wanted to shut them.. but i continued on drinking my coffee instead....i dont' want to and i don't like to get involve into DuRTY stuff.....its just discussting and thier conversations went no where, from the point of what is sexual herastment to the detains what a guy could do to a girl , the difference between being a virgin and not, to insulting each other..............eh , horrible horrible day.............i was so discussed by their conversation..........i didn't see it funny in any way, and i don't like when people talk about stuff publicly that should be discussed at home or with beloved ones....c'mon not everything should be shared with public............don''t you know that........and than she went saying that all men are like that, c'mon i am a girl and i don't think that! iIf you think that way, that means YOU have problems not everyone around you. It means , YOU got to deal with them not to blame everyone else around you and telling horrible stories, scaring good and innocent people around....aren't am i right? i should have told her that......but i didn't , maybe it a good thing, cause i don't want her to go mad at me, i have feelings and her problems are her problmes....Than my second partner came in late,,,,,,,,,fuck............. i was so counting on him, i didn't prepare my lesson because he was so exciting about doing it the way that he wants that i let it be just the way that he wanted, but no, he came in very late.. is this a bad day or what?
oh yeah, talking about sexual herrastment that man on the morning train was totaly over me, he couldn't get any more closer than he did.....asshole...
ah, i had no idea that my class, those freshments are so durty, punish them...
most of them....
ah, i feel better now, ok i am going to go to my eco class and chat with my friend, i need fresh ideas and air.......
adios............
me.....
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