U ljubiimogo segodnja denj rozhdenija, postarel mlin.... nu ni4ego on mne i staren'kim sgoditsja

Mozhno tak skazatj poznaju prelesti drugoi kuljturi i ee osobennosti.

S osbennost'ju velosipednih progulok ja poznakomilas' v pervie dni svoego priezda (ni4ego neimeju protiv takovih) i experiment etot bil svoego roda neziprijatnih. Idu sebe, voron kak voditsja pos4ittivaju i tut slishu zvon: povora4ivaju svoi lik jasnij v storonu shuma i vizhu, 4to na menja dvizhetsja gora (a govorjat 4to gora neidjot k muhamedu ja narushila tradiciju), pri4em gora eta vozmus4ena do glubini dushi. Tut menja ozarilo, 4to progulo4nim tempom ja dvigajusj po doroge otdanoj meriej goroda v bezrazdeljnoe poljzovanie velosipedistam. Ja nesovershala podobnih piruetov so vremen zanjatij baletom. Eto bil gracioznij (ja nadejusj) prizhok (tut ja narushila zakon fiziki) v visotu i, poistine 4empionskij prizhok v dlinu s prizemleniem na bardjur4ik, otdeljajus4ij vladenija velosipedistov ot vladenij avtomobilistov. Tak ja okozalasj v polnom smisle etogo virazhenija "mezhdu dvuh ognej". Dumatj bilo nekogda, nado bilo spasatj svoju ts4edushnuju zadnicu ot Jeepa Kia Sorento (etu marku ja zapomnju na vsju svoju zhiznj) voditelj kotorogo, bil estesvenno nerad moemu vnezapnomu pojavleniju na bardjur4ike i azhiotazhmin vzmaham rukami v ot4ajanom poiske ravnovesija, no ono, ravnovesije nikak nehotelo lovitsja. Estestveno kak voditelj voditelja ja ponjala ego vozmus4enije, obi4no nikak neznaesh 4ego ozhidatj ot takih vot prigajus4ih damo4ek. V itoge ja pricepilasj k ravnovesiju, vcepilasj v nego rukami zubami esli bi mogla nogami,to i imi zhe vcepilasj bi tozhe. Ostanovila ja besporjado4nie vzmahi rukami i, zamerla, zloj jeep pronessja mimo i tut, proizoshlo nepredvidennoe, porivom vetra, vizvannogo zlim jeepom menja stalo krenitj na velosipedistov, ja opjatj zamahala rukami. Priobretennij opit pomog mne vcepitsja v ravnovesie opjatj, tut ja popitalasj soorentirovatsja na mestnosti i nashla uzkuju spasiteljnuju polosku nazivajemuju trotuarom. Ja sovershila korotkuju perebezhku i perevela dihanie kogda moi stupni kosnulisj etoi tverdini.
Potom misli vihrem nakinulisj na menja, no samaja nazoi livaja iz nih bila "Blin podumala ja, mnogoe bi otadala 4tobi okazatsja na meste nabljudatelja, a ne u4astnika" ....

V4era bil zame4ateljnij denj (imeju vvidu pogodu) , a segodnja po hollandski dozhdlivo .... zhutj .
Teperj ja znaju 4ego oni legalizovali kurenie travki, bez etogo iskustvennogo fana oni bi utonuli v depresii. A tak pokurjat i vrode dozhdj ne tak ushz i ploh. Strana robotov.Vsjo postroenno na zarabativanii deneg i trate ih zhe krovno zarabotannih.
V normaljnosti esli vihodish na ulicu posle 18:00, to vstretitj prohozhih ravnosiljno mission imposible. V eto vremja oni vse edjat svoi dinner. Umeretj i nevsataj vsja strana zhujot v odno vremja. Eto es4o ne vsjo. 4to takoe peshaja progulka - eto prokatka na velosipede...Dazh na svidanija oni nehodjat,a ezdjat.Sama videla umudrjajutsja es4o za ru4ki derzhatsja ...

V4era mne bilo grustno i zhiznj bila sovsem nepohozha na skazku. Segodnja menja etot fakt ne osobenno trogaet. Mogu smelo skazatj 4to v4era bilo tak , a segodnja budet tak i citiruja Fainu Ranevskaju "Moja zhiznj bila skoree pohozha na skorostnoj zapliv stilem buterfly v unitaze".
No ni4ego mi boremsja. Samoe strashnoe eto kogda sku4no.Skuka porozhdaet depressiju, a depresija greh. Nepomnju to4nuju formullirovku v biblii, no smisl primerno takov "Uninie besovskoe ot sebja goni". Vot ja i starajusj ne greshitj.

Serathima

Ïîäðóãà ëüóáèìàæ îçàäà4èëà, çàðàçà

Vsjo kak-to smeshalosj ivdrug ostanovilosj...iteperj sootvetsvenno j parju gde-to mezhdu nebom i zemljoi.....Vozmozhno ja prosto splju ivsjo mne snitsja i eto vsjo nastoljko nerealjno.
Prosnutjs strashno, no nadozhe odin raz v zhizni nabratj vozduha i prosto otkritj glaza i skazatj sebe ili drugomu : Vot ja reshila posmotretj na sebja i na tebja v realjnoati ..... I vi znaete vozmozhno menja ozhidajut sjurprizi ( ja ih neljublju), a eto zna4it zhiznj moja ne budet sku4noj

Da uzh, poveleniju serdca tozhe kak-to neposhlo...
Ne tak davno, a tobish v4era, ot ne4ego delatj,v poezdah obi4no ne4ego delatj (mozhno kone4no pokoketni4atj s sosedjami ili naplesti s tri koroba,no ja eti shtuki ostavila v daljokom detsve) ja zadalasj statisti4eskim voprosom.Esli pods4itatj vsjo vremja kotoroe ja provozhu v samoljotah, poezdah ili mashine, to polu4aetsja , 4to v obs4ej slozhnosti ja puteshestvuju kazhdij vtoroj denj.
kto-to skazhet vot povezlo nesku4no,a ja skazhu, duraki vi necenite to ,4to imeete u vas dom,druzja plani na voskresenije,a u menja nifiga etogo net..druzja kone4no estj, no oni v odnoj strane, a ja v drugoi i vizhu ja ih tolko kogda priezhzaju pokazatsja na glaza mame i to probegom.A plani na voskresenije ja kone4no mogu sebe ustroitj,no oni mogut bitj narusheni odnim lish zvonkom i...
kak vsegda tri nedeli nazad ja bila doma (Riga) priletela domoi (Barcelona) vzjala mashinu i poehala domoi(Holland) bila tam nedelju vernulasj dva dnja i ja v Valencii, nu a 9 sept.ja budu opjatj v Hollandii.(Tak posmotrish i vezde ja doma ...Dur dom..Ho4u domoi k mame ; ) Prjanikov domashnih i ni4ego nedelatj.Bitj ho4u opjatj kak v detstve bezotvetsvennoi, 4tobi ni4ego nenado bilo reshatj i otve4atj nikomu ni4ego nenado bilo.
Ladno v zadnicu minuti slabosti...
ZHIZNJ PREKRASNA I O:........ pupiteljna.
Ja grazhdanin wsego mira, matj ego...
Serathima

Опять я пытаюсь завести не4то похожее на дневник.Но я небуду давать столь громкого названия, а скажем просто тетрадь для попутных записей. Мне всегда хотелось вести дневник, но как-то я всьо соскакивала. Озна4ает ли это мою неусид4ивость или, может бить, неприви4ку закан4ивать на4атое дело. Один период в своейжизни я даже кофе доконца недопивала.Ну скажем в этот раз я буду просто иногда писать.По велению сердца.

...."Pity us, O Lord, for we are pilgrims on the road, and our being here may be a vice. In your infinite pity, help us never to turn our knowledge against ourselves. "Have pity on those who pity themselves and who see themselves as good people treated unfairly by life -- who feel that they do not deserve what has befallen them.Such people will never be able to fight the good figth.And pity those who cruel to themselves and who see only the evil in their own actions,feeling that they are to blame for the injustice in the world.Because neither of these kinds of people know thy law that says,' But the very hairs of your head are numbered.'
"Have pity on those who command and those who serve during long hours of work,and who sacrifice themselves in exchage mereby for a Sunday off, only to find that there is nowhere to go, and everything is closed.But also have pity on those who sanctify their efforts, and who are able to go beyond the bounds of their own madness, winding up indebbed, or nailedto the cross by their very brothers.Because neither of these kinds of people know thy law that says, 'Be ye therefore as wise as the serpents and as harmless as the doves.'
"Have pity on those who may conquer the world but never join the good fight within themselves.But pity also those who have won the good fight within themselves, and now find themselves in the streets and thebars of life because they were unable to conquere the world.Because neither of these kinds of people know thy law that says,'He who heeds my words I will liken to a wise man who built his house on rock.'
"Have pity on those who are fearful of taking up a pen, or a paintbrush, or an instrument, or a tool because they are afraidthat someone has already done so better than they could, and who feel them selves to be unworthy to enter the marvelous mansion of art.But have even more pity on those who, having taken up the pen, or the paintbrush, or the instrument,or the tool, have turned inspiration into a paltry thing, and yet feel themselves to be better than others.Neither of these kinds of people know thy law that says,'For there is nothing covered that will not be revealed, nor hidden that will not be known.'
"Pity those who eat and drink and sate themselves, but are unhappy and alone in their satiety. But pity even more those who fast, and censure and prohibit, and who thereby see themselves as saints, preaching your name in the streets.For neither of these types of people know thy law that says,'If I bear witness of myself, my witness is not true.'
"Pity those who fear death, and are unaware of the many kingdom through wich they have already passed, and the many deaths they have already suffered, and who are unhappy because they think that one day their world will end. But have even more pity for those who already know their many deaths, and today think of themselves as immortal. Neither of these kinds of people know thy law that says,'Except that one is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.'
"Have pity on those who bind themselves with the silken ties of love, and think of themselves as masters of others, and who feel envy, and poison themselves, and who torture themselves because they cannot see that love and all things change like the wind. But pity aven more those who die of their fear of loving and who rejact love in the name of greater love that they know not. Neither these kinds of people know thy law that says,'Whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will never thirst.'
"Pity those who reduce the cosmos to an explanation, God to a magic potion, and humanity to beings with basic needs that must be satisfied, because they never hear the music of the spheres.But have even more pity on those who have blind faith, and who in their laboratories transform mercury into gold, and who are surrounded by their books about the secrets of Tarot and the power of the pyramids. Neither of these kinds of people know thy law that says,'Whoever does not recieve the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it.'
"Pity those who see no one but themselves, and for whom others are blurred and distant scenario as they pass through the the streets in their limousines and lock themselves in their air-conditioned penthouse offices, as they suffer in silence the solitude of power.But pity even more those who will do anything for anybody, and are charitable, and seek to win out over evel only through love.For neither of these kinds of people know thy law that says,'Let he who has no sword sell his garment and by one.'
"Have pity, Lord, on we who seek out and dare to take up the sword that you have promised, and who are a saintly and sinful lot scattered throoghout the world. Because we do not recognize even ourselves, and often think that we are dressed, but we are nude; we believe that we have committed a crime, when in reality we have saved someone's life. And do not forget in your pity for all of us that we hold the sword Читать далее...

"Though I speak with the tongues of men and angels... and though I have the gift of prophecy... and have all faith so that I could remove mounatins..and have not love, I am nothing."
Saint Paul