During our English lessons we may do everything but not speak English! I don't know why our teachers desided that we needn't the practice of speaking! Or they think that we should know everytning and we have no choice but to watch films?..
But inspite of it our universty is proud of their students! Of course we are the best specialists of English because everyone study at different courses of language! And our knowledges aren't services of this university!
So... Why do I tell about it? I have to go to courses... Times, money... I thought and desided to go to RUDN. May be I'll even find an english-speaking friend there...

I want to begin to read...
One fellow adviced me (by the way, he is a native speaker) to read more if I want to improve my English (as though I don't know about this without his words! )
I don't know yet what I'll read: classical literature or just newpapers or magazines... Of corse classical literature can't be compared with anything! But then I need a dictionary and it's difficult sometimes to take it with me everywhere. And classical literature is classical English. But I want to learn a colloqual language...

Now I have a restrain mood with the expectaction of something grandiose and extraodinary... hmmm... Like a sun)))
I feel incredibly many energy! But... At the same time I feel myself falling on the Earth.
Is it spring?..

So I've to make a choice... I've to deside where I'll go in summer.
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My sisters suggest me to go to the South again. We were there last year and I liked this trip very much! Of course the sun, the sea... It's some kind of Eden!
But...

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I want to go to St. Petersburg. I love this city very much! I was there just one time, but it was... wounderful!!! I liked to walk in its streets, to go by a boat, to go to the churces, cathedrals, mansions, palaces... It's a tale... Tale of me childhood!

So, I have an opportunity to go to the South or to St. Petersburg. Of couse most of you can't understand why I'm thinking... But I can't take a desigion...(((

This week was very difficult for me. First of all we had a lot of tests, we wrote a lot of compositions. I can't write compositions. I love write them in Russian but not in English, becuse I can't express my feelings, I can't explain them.
Now, at home I try to speak in English with myself. When my mother saw it... I felt myself stupid))) But what shall I do? I have nobody here to speak with me!

Today I saw two black fellows. They were going behing me, and firstly I heard so loving English speech! I wanted to connected them very much!!!!! But I couldn't because I think it would seem stupid... I tried to show them, that I was inerested in their discussion... But they were interested much more than me and didn't pay attention to a girl...
So today I lost 2 my dreams: to make friends with black man and to speak English with native speakers...

I want to visit London... This is my dream. I've read a lot of information about this city. I've learned a lot of topics about cuture, people, government and sights of it. I've fell in love with London. And I love it now very much. This is the love for a distance. I look at the pictures in my textbooks, I see London's streets in films, I read about London's life in newspapers... And I feel an unconquerable wish to live there just a little...
Study of English begins with London. And the most beautiful pictures are in schools' textbooks. And there London is presents as a dream, a fairy-tale... Westminster Abbey, the Houses of Parliament, Buckingham Palace, Big Ben... I just want to see them...
Russian people say: "To see Paris - and to die"... (Unfortunately, I don't know English equivalent). And I want to see a London - and... no, not to die! To live! To breathe! To remember that special air!..
I want to know London not from books and pictures. I want to know it from my heart...
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The main aim of this diary... Mmmm... How to say? I want to think in English, I want ot express my emotions, feelings... But now I just translate senteses.
So I want to express my thoughts. I make up sentenses in Russian in my mind, then I try to translate it, to find unknown words (if they are) in dictionary... And only then I speak or write. In my opinion it's unnormal. I'm a linguist, I'll communicate with different people, English people!
So, I want to forget Russian for some time!)))

I didn't think, that I would begin to write here... But... I don't know what's happened))) I desided, that I should to train and perfect my English. And sometimes I want to express my emotions and thoughts in English.
So I'll try do it here))) I don't think that notices here will be deep and so private, but who knows?!)))

If you deside to comment my posts you may do in in Russian of course. And I'll answer you in Russian then, but my posts will be only in English...)