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I know that I need to speak only in English but I'm afraid to loose my first language. Maybe, it seems imposible but I'm here just 8 month and I'm already feel that I'm loosing that. It's awful.
I was thinking that my future - my russian language, I wanted to write. But life destroying my dream. It's painful.
fuck..

and now I feel that I hate my mother. maybe, it's stupid but it's a truth, it's what I feel...

















do I need to continue...?