В колонках играет - Pax Dloum - Enya
Настроение сейчас - Thoughtful

I'm bored. Very bored. And sleepy. But I can't sleep, it's too early. I feel abandon to some point. And lonesome. Maybe it's because of the music? I dunno but either way I feel forsaken. Why? Who knows.

Sometimes I wish I were crazy. But sometimes I think "what if I'm really crazy but I can't see it?" - and it scares me. But what do we know about this world? What if it doesn't really exist? What if all this shit around is nothing but a complicated illusion? Just like Zen says? We will never know for sure, right? So if it's an illusion, does it depend on us if the illusion is nice or not? And how do we know we are actually alive? What if it's ... some sort of limbo or purgatory? What if none of this actually exists? Is everything pointless then? Or does it mean the point is infinite? Will we ever know? I think not. And that is actually the point. To live without knowing. And if so... does it mean that death brings all the answers? And does it mean the shorter we live the less we suffer? No, my innermost voice says it's wrong.... Where is the truth then? Does anybody know the answer at all?!