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the sweetest pain. the worst pain. the pain of cruel expectations, of pointless dreams and false hopes. the pain that fills the emptyness inside but keeps all other fellings out of your mind. the pain that brings load silence into your soul. the pain that purifies you but then leaves you without even a drop of blood in your veins. i look into the mirror and i see my dearest lover - my pain. it's in every my sad smile, in my tired eyes. it slowes my breathing, it makes my voice tremble, and only tears remind me that i'm not dead yet.