I've never thought that it would be so hard at the end, but the fact remains. These awful feelings just overwhelm my brains. They hold me in unknowigness, I feel like balancing and edges are so close, so near and so unstable. And now I don't exactly understand between what exactly I am trying to find that balance. It's so painfully unbearable when the thing, which have been so desired for so long time, is almost in your hands, but the process of its obtaining is rather hard. Time is cruel, it does not wait and it does not except any excuses which sometimes are so helpful, but not in this case. I am afraid that I can screw it all up, all these years of terrible persistence. I just have no right for making any mistake at all.
No mistakes, no fear, only positive thoughts, a bit of optimism, confidence and faith - that's a receipt of my success!!!!