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Mark Twain quotes...

Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more..

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear - not absence of fear.

I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him.

It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.

Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.

My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.

Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.

The best way to cheer yourself is to try to cheer someone else up.

The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.

The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.

When people do not respect us we are sharply offended; yet deep down in his private heart no man much respects himself.

When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.

A human being has a natural desire to have more of a good thing than he needs.

There are several good protections against temptations, but the surest is cowardice.