today...it's his birthday. What do I feel? I like him..really, a lot. That is why I stoped to communicate with him. I have other man in my life...one is enougth. my one is gelous, but kind, and he loves me to deth, I know that I'm the only reason he changed his life...I'm the only one who can make him better. But the other one is so different...I realize that it could be a good and pasionate time for both of us. I don't know if he still loves...likes me or not..of cource I let him know there is no future for us so there was no reason to try. He is a very cool guy of cource he has a girl..probably not a soulmate but at list the one to fuck with! I understand that! I kissed him ones...it was my birthday, it was very difficult situation and I try to make an exuse...saying that my man wasn't with me and I missed him a lot...his hands, lips, body so on! I did! But this other man was near and he wanted me that night...I was a little drunk...so it was hard to control myself. We were in the car, backsits, he huged me, I waned sex...one second...i stoped to control myself and my ipulses came out...I kissed him, and the worst in this moment was...I wanted to kiss HIM that moment! guilty.
I've sent him text message and waited...still waiting for the answer...I now he got it, but didn't say anything in return...probubly he hasn'r read it yet.

I want to forget him like there was no him in my life, but I can't. I love my life...I love person I live with, but there is always a memory about that kiss.